Happy New Year -

Veronica is some amount of weeks today, but I'll have to try to get a picture later. It has been kind of a crazy day around here. I am trying to post my favorite pictures from this year and it is a little harder than you would think. Anyway, here's my favorite picture post of Veronica, even though I love all pictures of her and her sweet face.

First Christmas - 32 Weeks

 
Veronica had a good day, napped well, was good at my mom and dad's. But she went to sleep badly and cried for quite a while and now she is screaming away at not even 10:00, so not a great ending. I really wish it were different, I don't know what else I can do. I haven't had caffeine in over a month, I try to get her to nap well, I try to feed her even though she won't eat anything on a spoon. I'm really at a loss as to why these kids have such a hard time going to sleep. I suppose if it's still this bad when she's 9 months old, I'll have to ask her doctor. I know he'll just tell me to let her cry but seriously, she has been crying for MONTHS now. Anyway. First Christmas. Crying. :)

Yes?

 
May I help you? :)

I am still struggling with getting this child to sleep without screaming her fool head off every time! The last two nights have been very rough, lots of screaming, no nursing, she seems miserable and I am, too. She doesn't really get an afternoon nap, because it's tooooo crazy around here but I am going to try to commit to it because it's too painful to listen to her cry so much. Still no sitting up or eating. Same baby, different day!

31 Weeks

 
This is a better picture, anyway. Veronica has been sleeping pretty badly and is still not sitting up or anything. She and Maria are needy little things all day and that's why I haven't been posting much. Also I hate to record such misery.

Bow

 
ha.

Poor Stupid Baby

 
I know this picture is awful, my GOD this camera is a pain. I'm trying to fix it but I don't know if maybe it's just broken, like maybe some jerk dropped it on the floor or something? But ha, look at poor Veronica! Poor stupid baby.

Seven Months

 
Veronica is seven months old today, but she is sleeping like a seven week old! I am very hopeful that this is just a horrific, long-lasting phase, but right now she is up all the time in the night. She isn't eating anything off a spoon, but she will eat some fruit in her little mesh bag, and she'll eat Nilla wafers, pretzels, bagels and waffles. It's so weird that she hates the spoon so much! Her doctor told me to just find something she likes and keep giving it to her, but I am still searching. She is sweet, and she is getting better and better able to amuse herself for a few minutes in the exersaucer. She is sitting up, but only when propped and only for a few seconds. She took such a long bath tonight, she seemed so happy and content in there I just did the dishes while she bathed. She curled herelf around in two, toward the end, splashing and happy. It was super cute and sweet, just like her!

30 Weeks

 
Veronica, lying around on the floor this morning, after a three hour nap. She was up a lot in the night, crying for an hour at 8:30, up to eat at 11:00 and 1:00 and then for the day at 5:15. So. Not great!

Sleep Training

Good God, will it ever end? V is almost seven months old and still, almost every nap, almost every night when I put her to bed, there is crying. Tonight is the third night in a row that she wakes up crying around 8:30. I haven't gone up, because I know that she needs to go back to sleep, she doesn't need to nurse, she is dry, etc. I feel so bad, I start to think maybe Anthony is waking her up (he is LOUD) or maybe she hates her surroundings (she is in a CLOSET) but what can you do? Anthony lives here. She is, in fact, in a closet, there is nowhere else for her right now. Every day I tell myself it will get better and every day she cries and cries. I can't believe, sometimes, that I just did this last year with Maria and now I'm doing it again. It's wearing. I hope it's worth it.

Blurry

 
I'm still working with my camera. Veronica is all better now, I'd say. Last night, althought she made noise at 9 and 10, I didn't hear it, because I was out drinking! ha! I was going to say that I didn't feed her then, she only woke up to eat at like 3:00 and only for a little bit, then she went back to sleep til 6:30. So that is much better than she had been doing. Sunday - Wednesday nights she was up around midnight, for the day, practically. She was so, so unhappy and ferverish, it breaks my heart to see her like that. She would fall asleep and then snap awake, scared and crying. Hoo boy. I'm glad it's over and once again, I am always so grateful for what we have when one of them gets sick. She got sick and got better and now it's a memory. We are very lucky.

Remote

 

29 Weeks

 
she's all better, turns out it was roseola. I wish they didn't have to put a catheter in her, TWICE, to find that out, but I think it's unusual for a baby Veronica's age to get it. She seems better now, I gave her a bath today and she really liked it. Unfortunately, she is asleep right now and I have to go and wake her so I can go get Anthony. It pains me SO to wake a sleeping baby, especially one I've been up with for hours and hours for a week, but there it is.

Sicko

 
oh, she is sick! This is the fourth time she's been sick in SIX MONTHS. The hell, world?

28 Weeks

 
Outtake from our try at a Christmas card picture. Oh, Veronica. You're right to be suspicious! Look at her surroundings!

I am so thankful that we had our little Veronica this year. I remember when I first found out I was pregnant, I was so worried that I would have another boy and that he would be autistic, too. Of course, I didn't care, really, but it was just a thought I had in the beginning. I remember driving Anthony home from school one day in May, shortly before I had Veronica, and I thought I do not care if this is a boy or a girl, or if he or she has two heads and six feet, I just can't wait to meet this baby! I am thankful that even though she had a rough start, there in the hospital, that she left that constant care nursery and has never had another problem. I am thankful that she finally got the hang of nursing, when I was really worried that she wouldn't Of course, now she won't take a bottle, or a pacifier, or even let food touch her lips, but I'm sure that will pass. I am thankful that she is so smiley and so happy for a large part of the day. I am thankful that Maria loves her so much and is so sweet to her. I am thankful that she only has two hands with which to pull the holy hell out of my hair. :)

Swinging

 
Worriedly. God knows what she is worried about all the time. Maybe that she'll never sleep through the night? If so, then we are worried about the same thing. :)

Swinging

 

27 Weeks

I'll post a picture later, all I have are crappy ones now, because of my camera's shutter speed problem and the dark day. But Veronica is 27 weeks old, closer to 1 than none, I guess. Last night she slept from 7:30 or so until 2:00 and then ate and went back and was up at 5:00 this morning. That is much better than she had been doing. I gave up caffeine yesterday, I don't know if it is going to make a difference or not but I have to try something. She has been waking up a lot, early in the night, like 10:00, and then she is up every few hours, like a newborn. I am dying of being so tired for so long, so I figure I should try the no caffeine thing and see how she does before I have her cry it out. I'd rather not do that, for her and also for us!, since she's in our room. I have had a wicked headache for two days but if it works, it will be worth it. A friend of mine told me that she'd go without caffeine AND oxygen, if it meant her kid would sleep. Ha! And also? Boo hoo!

High Chair

 
She is not taking to eating very well. I might try again next week. She doesn't nurse any less if she eats - she doesn't nurse too much, really. I wish she would sit up! I KNOW I'm complainy but it's getting to be a complete drag to carry her around every where. Also, she cried for 20 minutes today before she fell asleep for her afternoon nap. I've been doing nap training for TWO MONTHS! Grrr! It's super frustrating to try and try and TRY and TRY with all of them and get the same results - they're all living, healthy, but unpleasant. Maybe today is the day that she'll get it.

I took her to church with me last night, as usj, and she is very cute and charming there. Everyone stops to tell me how cute she is. These little girls, maybe 12 and 10? Or something? Sit behind us and make her laugh and I can feel how happy she is about it, she smiles and giggles. Then she licks all over my face, like a dog, and I am sopping wet by the end. I'm glad we don't shake hands anymore in church, ha!

26 Weeks

 
Veronica has been doing well. I want to give her some cereal or food this weekend, since she'll be six months old, but frankly she is not sitting up very well in the seat. She's not a great sitter. I hope that she gets it together here soon. She kind of refuses to bend at the waist? I'm sure it's nothing, but just the same, if she could go ahead and develop normally, that would be fine by me.

I am editing this to say that this outfit is an early Christmas gift from my sister Laura. It's from Land's End and the top is the softest fleece you have ever felt. The bottoms are pink and white cotton and they are just super nice. I'm very impressed with the Lands End clothes. And with Laura. :)

Too Big

 
for the swing.

Almost Six Months Old

 
Veronica is upstairs sleeping for the first time today! I thought (hoped) she'd nap in the car on the way to Maria's class but - she didn't! She kept WHAPPING her head down on my shoulder during the class but then she'd jump back up. She is so much more complicated now, two months ago, she would have slept on the way up AND during the class, but now she's much more interested in things. Anyways. Her cold is getting better, I'd say, and she was (praise GOD!) only up one time last night. I was so tired I fell asleep with her down on the chair and I don't even really remember what time we got up, but I know I took her back up some time after 2:00, and she slept until 7:30 this morning. Laura is coming over to babysit tonight so we can go to dinner for Mike's birthday, so I am hoping and praying that she sleeps well tonight, too. Of course, because I want her to AND because I mentioned it, it will now never happen. Sorry, Laura! Ha!

Waah! I Hab a Cold! (25 weeks)

 
Poor Veronica. This is her third cold in her life! That's one every two months! The hell? I was under the impression that the breastfed babies were going to have GOOD immune systems! I suppose that it could be worse, maybe the breastmilk helps it be a cold and not the flu or pneumonia or something. Anyways, she is sick and so, so snuffy and grumpy. My poor little baby. Also? Poor me because she can't sleep for anything. :)

Veronica

 
"enjoying" a nice Sunday.

Pretty Baby...

 
...crappy sleeper. :)

Help Meeeeee! (24 weeks)

 
Look at her face here. Ha!

Scary! But Cute!

 
This is an outfit from my mom, isn't it cute? V is lying on the futon mattress downstairs, it's a wreck from Anthony and Maria tromping all over it. She has been sleeping v. v. badly, so I don't want to talk about it. She also is super cute but has started to pull the holy hell out of my hair. OUCH.

Jenny

 
This outfit was Maria's, from my cousin Jenny. It's so cute. Veronica is back to waking twice a night, which stinks, but I am just trying to keep the tv off and not look at my phone or anything so I can go right back to sleep. She sleeps for 12 hours with two wakings, which I guess isn't that bad. She's cried like the devil herself today, going down for naps, which is depressing, but what can you do? Birds fly, babies cry, as my sleep book doctor says.

23 Weeks

 
I have to say, the weeks are flying by. Imagine that it took having three kids for me to have the time go by fast. V is doing fine, sweet as ever, although she was fired UP in the car today after getting Anthony. Traffic was awful and I had to stop and get gas. Whenever she is screaming like that and stops, I always am afraid she's passed out. She's moving around a lot, rolling rolling, all over the floor. She is in six month clothes. In just a few weeks, we'll start her on food, which seems fast, but which I am really excited about. Maybe she'll start to love a bottle, too? Please, God?